You know when you say something without quite thinking and wonder where that came from? Well, there is another level when you become a parent. You find yourself saying things to your kids and thinking “wow, never thought I’d be stringing those words together”. I have been trying to remember a few of the good ones, so here goes:
“Don’t scratch your nose with the fork, you might poke your eye.” Here, I thought to myself, forks and (human) eyeballs do not naturally come out of one’s mouth in the same sentence.
“Take the tip of the banana out of your nose.” I guess my kids have itchy noses.
“Please don’t lick the school railing.” It had rained and he was thirsty.
“Don’t drink the bath water.” That water is cleaning your bum.
“Toilet bowls are not for hands.” Yuck.
“No, you can’t put the lip gloss you found in the parking lot on your lips.” That one is more predictable, but I am running out of material.
Last for today, “Please do not say boobie butt naked penis toot. That is rude.” Who knew you could make up a sentence of only “bathroom words”, as the school calls it. Hard not to laugh when they find it so hysterical. Better to save it for the farm with “Poopy”, otherwise known as Popi. I am so glad to have you Popi, the kids adore you and they can get out all their “poops”.
That’s all for today folks.